


If This is Heaven, then Where's Sam?

by Sams_Girl441



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cute, Dean Dies, Heaven, Hell, Hurt Sam Winchester, I Don't Even Know, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Non-Graphic Violence, Sad Ending, Scared Dean, Scared Sam, Sorry Not Sorry, Tags May Change, s
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-24
Updated: 2017-08-24
Packaged: 2018-12-19 11:13:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11896563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sams_Girl441/pseuds/Sams_Girl441
Summary: Dean ends up in Heaven, but Sammy's not there with him so is it really heaven? And does he really want Sammy there with him? Leave their daughter all alone in this big scary world at such a young age? What really happened?





	If This is Heaven, then Where's Sam?

**Author's Note:**

> This idea came to me late at night when I probably should have been sleeping, but this is me and I was not. I watched a SPN Vid and the title started getting the ideas rolling. What if Dean died while they were on their final hunt, even worse he died shortly before their daughters birthday. He ended up in heaven, except what's heaven without Sammy?

  


**I woke up feeling foggy headed, I didn’t recognize my surroundings at first. It had been so long since I’d been here in this particular house that I had almost forgotten what it looked like. Almost. The baby blue walls, the hot wheels in the shape of my favorite classic cars. This room burned down over thirty years ago.**

**“Dean!” I quickly turned around at the sound of Sammy’s voice, but he was nowhere to be seen.**

**“Sammy?” I said, cautiously. This was a trick it had to be, I couldn’t remember how I had gotten here. It had to be some kind of a monster, another djinn maybe. Or some other supernatural freak.**

**“Dean! No! Get up, not again.” I was confused, because I could hear him, my precious baby brother, my everything, I swear I could almost feel his gigantor arms around me, holding me. I felt his tears on my face, but couldn’t actually see him.**

**“Sammy?!” I tried to call back out to him, but he couldn’t hear me. I couldn’t make my darling baby boy hear me.**

**“Dean?” I heard a much softer voice, call from the other side of the door. “”Dean, baby, are you okay?” The door swung open and who I saw standing on the other side had me stumbling back in surprise shock. It couldn’t be, no way, she was gone. Burned away when Sammy was just a baby.**

**“Mom?” I whispered.**

**“Dean, honey, are you okay? Did you have a nightmare, I heard you calling for Sammy. He’s asleep in his crib. Do you wanna see him?” I couldn’t do anything but nod my head, too shocked to fully comprehend what she had just asked me. She walked over and grabbed a hold of my hand leading me to Sammy’s nursery.**

**“This can’t be happening. This cannot be real.” I murmured to myself. We stopped in front of the door at the end of the hall, she carefully opened it and peeked inside before ushering me through.**

**“Go ahead, go see him. He’s sleeping.” She said, pushing me forward. I slowly walked towards the crib and looked inside, just to see baby Sam sleeping peacefully. I reached down and ran my hand down the side of his cheek reveling in the softness, so different from grown Sam’s skin, but familiar nonetheless. This was wrong, I wanted my Sam back.**

**I wanted the Sam I got to hold tightly every night, the Sam who woke me up in the morning with my favorite mug full of coffee thick enough I could stand a spoon straight up in it, just the way I like it. The Sam who was always trying to hide my “dead man’s” robe, because he said it freaked him out. The Sam who asked me to sing to him when he was sick or batted my hands away when he was injured insisting he was fine.              This wasn’t the Sam who held our daughter with more tenderness than I thought could come from a seasoned hunter. This wasn’t the Sam that fed me chicken soup, usually against my will, when I had the flu or who kept the bunker meticulously clean. Who struggled to figure how to hook up Emma’s car seat the day she came home from the hospital.**

**No, this was the innocent Sam who watched his mother burn to death on the ceiling, who was forced to drink demon blood to become part of some plan that we fought to stop years later. This was the Sam who would grow into my Sam, but I didn’t want this Sam, I wanted my Sam and our beautiful Emma. She was turning six tomorrow. What was Sammy gonna say happened to Daddy. She was practically attached to my hip, a symbiotic life form. I backed up trying to escape and knocked over the stupid lamp with clowns all over it, Sammy is terrified of clowns. Then everything went black. It was all dark, before images started flashing before my eyes and I began to remember.**

**Author's Note:**

> I have no beta, so I may go in and edit this after posting. Forgive my mistakes. Comments are my lifeblood.


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